Sometimes You Surprise Yourself

There have been many times in my life when I have said things like, "I'd never.." and then had to eat my words. I have surprised myself a lot over the years with how my life has gone. Today, I'm surprising myself once again.

I don't know that I have actually ever said, "I'd never have a day where my only goal was to get a hold of some marijuana" in fact, quite frankly I think I thought that was so far out of the realm of possibility, that I never even thought to make such a statement. Well, as life so has it, that is indeed my only goal for today.

No, I have not become suddenly rebellious or whatever, and no, the marijuana would not be for me, it would be for my love to try and combat my love's untouchable severe nausea. My love is miserable. In fact, those were exactly the words my love used the other day to describe how my love felt, miserable. It is heartbreaking to watch someone I love and care about so deeply suffer so. We have exhausted every other feasible option as far as I know. The doctors are rather stumped. Granted, the medical marijuana might not even help at this point, we don't know, but we have to try. We are hoping that my love might be able to tolerate having it made into a tea or some form of an edible something or other. Of course, though, I can't just stroll down to Walgreens and pick some up like I can with everything else we've tried. So I (you know, the one who grew up the straight-laced good little Mormon girl) have been making phone calls like a mad woman trying to get more information on how to obtain this alternative treatment. If someone ran my phone log today, they probably would think that I am actually a desperate drug-addict, instead of a loving partner, but I don't really care what it looks like, I just want to help my love feel better.

So yeah, I have called clinics that specialize in helping people get med cards, I've called dispensaries, I've called people who know people who use marijuana for medical purposes, and so far, no luck, but I am not giving up. I keep running into a ten to twenty-one day waiting period for the med card to be active or whatever so that we could legally purchase the marijuana. This is terribly frustrating to me, for a number of reasons. First, my love's doctors are totally on board, they just want my love to feel better. One of the doctors even said that if there was a way for her to write my love a temporary prescription kind of thing, that she would be happy to do so. They know my love has brain cancer, they know that my love isn't making it up, or trying to screw with the system or what not, my love just wants relief from the ever present severe nausea that this stupid new tumor is causing. Second, I feel like this waiting period is almost a punishment for being a "good, law-abiding citizen" that only turns to illicit substances as a last resort. Can't they come up with a "fast-track" system if a doctor signs off that their patient has exhausted other avenues. My love is way too miserable to wait ten to twenty-one days for relief. I'd like the idiotic government officials that created this stupid waiting period to feel the way my love feels for ten to twenty-one days and then come back and tell me how a waiting period makes sense in all circumstances. I get that people will try to take advantage of any system, but if someone is diagnosed with a serious illness like cancer and are terribly uncomfortable, they should not have to twiddle their thumbs for up to three weeks before getting relief.

So yeah, I am still searching and trying to get a hold of this stuff. Hopefully once we have it, it will work. If not, at least no one will be able to say we didn't try absolutely everything. Ugh!

Moral of the story, never say (or even think) "I'd never...." It will come back and bite you in the butt!